another movie review in which I don't actually review the movie but prattle on about myself because that is the purpose of anon blogs! duh.

just saw this...

...I don't think it's meant to depress people, but it left me feeling worse about myself than anything else! It seems my life mirrors her a little too closely-- minus the cute cop. Or any guy at all. Also minus the good looks and cute clothes, and sunny weather, and humor... but equal on the awkwardness!


so I've decided to put out a personal ad...



Single Pale Female Looking for a Non-Drooler...


--must be between the ages of 20-35.
           I could even be flexible on this. I would not turn away a cute 37 year-old, for instance. Especially if he was a cop and/or had a dreamy accent... (the two would seem incongruous, but hey, it worked in the movie...) Any younger, however, I feel is a bit exploitative. 


--must have a BMI between 18.5-24.9 (this, apparently, is "normal range"... yes, just had to look it up, and no, I am not even aware of my own BMI...)


--must enjoy a physical activity of some sort


--must participate in this physical activity on a semi-regular basis


--sex does not count


--neither does anything involving electronics.


--must love the outdoors


--must love dogs... to some degree. Ok, must TOLERATE dogs. Must be skeptical of cats...


--must be amused by small children, chipmunks, and me


--must have a GED, preferably a BA/ BS, and ideally an unquenchable thirst for knowledge...



I am being so flexible here, folks! Please. I can't be that atrocious. I swear I brush my teeth consistently. I mastered toilet training and have been a relatively fast learner since. I even shaved yesterday (AND washed my hair.) What more could you want?!