wonderings

Just was inspired by this blog (See entrance on 5/5/12).  So much of her writing mirrored my own life now, from her Political Science/ Pre-law majors and dreams of being a lawyer to her INFJ personality.

I really try to look to others for wisdom, especially those older than me. I'm at a pretty uncertain point in my life right now. Here's what's going on:

--Should I take the CELTA or ITTT ESL course? I think the difference is between an Ivy League / Community college. I can afford the CELTA but it would hurt. And taking the ITTT class would mean I could stay in my city, continue derby and...
--Find a Job? Should I take the summer off and focus on babysitting/ traveling, or should I live with relatives in Canada, or should I find a waitressing job and get tipssssss. or should I try and intern somewhere "prestigious" (a PR or law firm?) or... what??
--Should I still go to Korea to teach English?
--Should I look for a man? Is it ok that most turn me off, and the only ones I feel comfortable with are those that I'm intellectually attracted to, and therefore am physically unattracted to? I want kids one day, but I have never had a serious relationship, and now that I've reached the ripe old age of 22 and two days, I wonder if I'll EVER find "someone special". Or, rephrase-- someone special who hasn't already been spoken for. The world is looking smaller and smaller and I doubt anyone will be able to "get" my weird sense of humor or any other quirks. Or if they do that they won't be of the male species and mom will not approve.
--I feel I'm losing my faith, but I want it back. I don't want to be ashamed of my roots, and sometimes I get annoyed with myself for being "embarrassed" by my faith, especially around my derby sisters.
--I am getting FAT and not impressed with that direction. I am currently 5'8 and 149 pounds. Yuck! Yuck! YUCK!!! My biggest problem is boredom eating. And binging. Especially on sweets. Today I started running again and really do want to get back into a fitness routine. Maybe I can use this blog to be more accountable. More sleep, more water, less sugars, less snacks, less binging = happier me.

ok. this is so negative, and boring, and BLAH. but I had to get it out there. Hopefully, when my future starts to shape itself, everything will fall into place and I'll look back on this entry as entertaining...